Oscar the Grouch makes her annual reappearance for the holidays...

Now, don't get me wrong, I love Christmas, but its about sharing joy, and love, and living alone, I don't always feel that I have that....I know my family (extended) loves me, but they have their own kids, their own lives, their own holiday traditions...   (and yes, I do have mine, but its not as fun as when you have joyous little people waiting in eager anticipation)

I do have a tree, and a creche.  It used to feel more like Christmas when Vallis was together, and did the Lessons and Carols.   When I had a couple of holiday parties to go to.  Now, I just feel like the Grinch.  I don't want to do any holiday baking, because I'll eat it all.  

Oh Bah humbug.  Constantly visited by the ghosts of Christmases might-have-beens...  I find myself very jealous of folks who have kids, who have partners...  but I am, in some ways, doing better than some of the older ladies I know from work, who really have no family, who are really alone for the holidays.   Because I am young, I am healthy (relatively), and its not too late to adopt, to have a kid for next year, maybe, to share a little of what I have...

And maybe today I'll find some Christmas Spirit hiding under the mat...

But in the meantime, a ghost from Christmas Past...
Bah Humbug

Living Like Little House

So, as most of you reading this may know, there was a storm, and basically all of CT lost power.   So I was living a little like a pioneer...  (except for going to my car to recharge my cell, so I could look at the CLP updates for the outage map and curse).  But it was candlelight, candlelight and firelight...  lots of reading, some crosswords..

I heated stuff up in one-pot meals over sterno...which was also how I made my coffee in the morning.     built up a big fire at night, usually ended up using nine logs a night...  would toast myself well before bed, then run up and dive into the chilly bed until it warmed up.      I now know why they used bedwarmers!  

The irony of this is that I had just finished reading a book called "I'll see you in a Hundred years" where one couple had taken themselves and their young son back in time to 1900 for a year.   And so, I suppose, in a way I was more aware of what I needed to do.  (Although back in 1900 they didn't have to worry about pipes freezing, no indoor plumbing).

What I want for next time?  (Because there is going to be a next time, thank you CLP)  Some kind of woodburning or pellet stove upstairs.    A gas stove in the kitchen.   A bedwarmer.  A way to at least cook over the fireplace!  (more cast-iron, please!).  And a tablet of some sort, so I can keep up to date.  CLP and the town were both updating online.  HOW, may I ask, are people supposed to access the Internet if they have no power, no laptop, no smart phone, and no libraries to get to the Internet?

I also need to figure out a better place for my wood, for the next delivery.  

But at the same time that I had no power, it was still oddly peaceful.   No Internet, no classes, no activities...  just quiet and books...   sometimes on the couch in the sun, other times in front of the fireplace, or tucked up in bed with candles blazing....

Mea Culpa...but an exciting announcement.

Yes, yes, I know.  I'm becoming one of those blogs again....  apologizing for never updating...   flagellating myself continuously.  tsk tsk tsk on me.  But I have an excuse, I have been busy....  and I wanted to share something very very exciting!  I'm having an art show!   I'm going to be showing some of my ceramics, in conjuction with two other artists who are painters....

So it is very, very exciting for me....   I keep thinking that I should make some cards that people can buy....  because, even though my ceramics are turning into "attack of the giant boxes in the basement" (and really, all over the house), they are my babies.....and there is also a part of me that can't believe people would buy them.  Even though folks have asked, in the past....  I'm the teeny pic at the bottom....

Also adding a link to the Facebook event, too...   so please consider coming!

Come see Catherine!

PAN AM. Or Am Not?

Hmmm...  so I just watched Pan Am on Hulu.   Its very much along the lines of Mad Men, somehow...  the glorious age of America, when we were triumphant and a world power to be reckoned with.     And this leads me to wonder why we feel we need stories like this.   Is it because the rest of TV world is filled with the bad side of America?  There is Hoarders, what not to wear, the biggest loser (and thank goodness one of the trainers left that show, I saw a smidgen of the first show of this season...that is not a smart way to lose weight!).  There are shows where the father is crass, and the whole family is unrefined...  There's a show called "Intervention" and "Are You smarter than a fifth grader"?

Just so many, many, many shows about the negatives in this country.   And maybe that is why Mad Men is so popular.  And why I suspect they made Pan Am.   Because it shows America as a world power, as a shining star.   And I think we do need to take back the image of our country.   And we need to see ourselves in a positive light...It was a time when women dressed well, when men had their own role, when everything had a place, an idealistic show (both of them) about the times.

I just find it interesting...  and wonder if its a trend....  and in some ways I hope so, but in other ways not.  Because even though it was a photogenic era, it wasn't a wonderful era.  It wasn't fabulous for women, by any means.   An airline stewardess was often one of the few career paths open for women.    They were viewed as adornements...

And in terms of the new tv show, they had an Indian man in the cockpit?   It would have been highly unlikely in reality.  From what i remember from my childhood (seven years after the setting of the show), I remember blonde.  I don't remember ethnic.  I don't even really remember brunette, per se.... They had an Asian stewardess shown...  They haven't even shown the smoking.   Plays set in the era had smoking, constantly.   The characters were always reaching for cigarettes...  which at least Mad Men got right.   Mad Men has glossed over, a little bit, of some of the issues of the day, glamorized them a little, but Pan Am takes it to an extreme..... really trying to idealize an era.

Really? This is SO wrong.

So, I got on Facebook this morning, to see this link.  And this is just all kinds of wrong.    You can't plan for an abortion, it is an emergency measure.  Its not like having life insurance, or a spare tire.

As a woman of childbearing age (still squeaking in...thank you), I am horrified.     When you put any kind of clause on a freedom, "well, you can have an abortion only if you fit the following criteria", or "you have to get an abortion rider on your health insurance, just in case you need one, just in case you might get raped", then it destroys that freedom.   It make women subordinate.  Because all of a sudden we are paying money for something that might never happen.  And if a woman needs an abortion, she is already in a hard place.   And if she needs an abortion because she was raped?  

And this is a law that affects women, not men.   But suddenly women are becoming penalized, again, for rape.   Or penalized for having sex.  Because God forbid, a woman gets pregnant.  Birth control fails.  Even under the best of circumstances.  

This man has a teenage daughter.    Is he going to get an "abortion rider" for her?   No, his daughter might never get raped, but then again, it could happen tomorrow....  

Conversations with the "other" aka biased news reporting.

So, I was at a fair  on Sat.  I was waiting to try "sonic massage" (with gongs, interesting) and was making small talk with the other woman waiting with me.    She actually does PR/marketing for the Bushnell, and I tried to get her to come help my little theatre... but we got to talking after that...and she is Israeli.   We agreed on some things, that the US should keep its nose out of other people's business, and that we both gained weight when we came to the States.   (which we did, and twenty years later, its still with me...blah)

Anyway, there were a few times when you could tell we were both struggling to find diplomatic ways to talk about stuff...  we were both being VERY careful to pick our words.   But I was amazed to hear from her that she has been hearing that the Muslim Brotherhood is coming to power in Egypt, and that the Israeli websites/news sources she reads are predicting another Iran.  

Yet, at the same time, she hadn't heard that Mubarak and his sons had been arrested and were going to undergo a trial, which I thought was a positive step.  

She also reads the BBC website, which she said was pro-Arab.  

I did not say that one of my news sources is Al-Jazeera.

We both agreed that we hate the lack of reporting here in the States, Fox is one extreme, NBC is another.

Where is the middle ground?   There is such extreme bias in the news reporting that I have given up watching the news, really.   I check online, get updates and read articles that my Egyptian friends post on Facebook...  

But I have not gotten the impression that there is going to be another Iran.  I wonder if the Muslim Brotherhood is as prevalent as people outside Egypt seem to think.   I also got the impression that Tahrir helped people bond in good ways, as Egyptians.

But it was just fascinating having this conversation, from someone who, in some ways thinks  the same way, but in others, is completely different, and who is also of a nationality that I immediately go on "guard" with.   Not that I am offensive or defensive, but just cautious.  As was she with me.   Because that is what we were taught.  

On the apocalypse, hoarding, procrastination, and other fun things...

Occasionally, I have a lapse in judgement and watch hoarders.  

Then I get depressed.

Not that my house approaches that degree...  by a long shot.  But it is a far cry from what I want it to be, somehow.  Other things are always more important...   The places I volunteer at, the stuff I have to do that never gets finished...  

So I have piles.  Piles of mail, piles of ceramics, piles of dishes.  

I'm not a hoarder.  I can throw things out.

But I see so easily how people become hoarders.  Particularly if you live with one.

Which is why I only want to date neatniks now...  but at the same time, my house is not a neatnik house.

The eternal conundrum

Hopefully, the Rapture will sweep me away tomorrow.  Then I won't have to deal with any more crap.

(Of course, if it doesn't, then I'm screwed).