My Rear Mirror...

hmm, its actually an apt metaphor for life that my side mirror on my car is cracked. You always look at the past through a cracked lens.. Even though you supposedly have 20/20 hindsight, you don't. You are always evaluating the past in terms of the present, in terms of aging and increased understanding...

So, what has been this year? Its been a year with some new, wonderful friendships. A year with some growth, with more understanding of politics (I'm not saying I'll ever be able to deal with these, but I have a little more understanding of what is going on). Its been a year of growth, of increasing health, of a milestone birthday... its been a year of new friends, of rediscovering the old... its been a year of ups and downs...

I'm looking forward to the new year, too... but I'm not making resolutions. I'm making changes, but not labelling them as such. The most important thing I am doing is treating myself the way I deserve and being gentle with myself... I'm getting healthy, happy, fit. I'm going to get everything I planned on doing with my house done this year... and I'm sure I'll have setbacks, but there is always chocolate!

Upon further thought, I guess what I dislike about resolutions and lists is that they tend to make you think negatively. Now I'm not one for false positivity, or denial (although I've been in both states in the past, particularly adrift on the great river of De Nile), but at the same time, making an unrealistic resolution is good for no-one. It won't help me to say "Ok, I am never eating chocolate again" or to vow that I am going to join a gym and go work out every morning... I know those tactics don't work. I can say that I am only eating good chocolate. I can say that I will do situps, or get an exercise machine and work out 3 times a week at home.

I can say, "I am joining a CSA and will be eating healthy this winter". I can keep it about being healthy, and balanced and having good influences in my life. I'm all about the positive.