Disappointment, aka creme de la creme and 'the rest'

So I'm terribly disappointed. I worked really hard on my audition piece, really hard. I thought I'd auditioned the best I ever had, and still got shoved into the chorus. I really wanted a PART. I know I can't dance, but I thought I did well with the rest of it.

I do tend to feel like I'm almost 40 and haven't accomplished anything. *sigh*. I had a dance teacher once who divided the class into the 'creme de la creme' and the rest. I got put in the 'rest'. I feel like I always get put with the 'rest', no matter how hard I work.

I may call them back and turn it down. I wanted a part. And it sounds like they've given all the small parts away, and there's only so much ensemble one woman can do without something meatier...

And part of me wonders if I'd taken the time to work on Vallis with my voice teacher if maybe I would have gotten to do something fun there..... instead of getting put with the 'rest'. But I doubt it.

It just hurts so much. I hate being classified as 'not good enough'.